The Bishop - Chapter Eleven: The Bishop Returns to Hampton's Corners

 Chapter Eleven: The Bishop Returns to Hampton's Corners

"Here's the cheque, Bishop."  Maddie handed Bishop Perkins a cheque for the parish arrears that Judy Jumblejump had held back as an act of defiance in an attempt to negotiate a better parish assessment rate from the Diocese.

"Well, well. I am impressed, Maddie."  The Bishop had arrived earlier than necessary that Sunday morning for his parish visit as he wanted a few minutes alone with Maddie before his old flock started showing up. "How on earth did you get her to sign that?"

"Oh, she didn't," Maddie said, "She still refused, but she didn't stand in the way of Reg or the deputy warden signing it. I just told her that I was advising you that a Bishop's Commission should be appointed to investigate the matter, and that since we were not 'able' to pay the bill, that you would likely dismiss the wardens and place the church under diocesan administration."

The Bishop smiled, "...And what did she say?

"Oh, she yelled, wagged her finger at me and said that you would never betray her that way.  I told her that it wasn't a matter of that. I said I had already had a meeting with Archdeacon Ready and Canon Sharpe, and that they and the Chancellor had convinced you to begin proceedings..."

"A white lie."

"Yes, but for the sake of baby Jesus, Bishop."

"Indeed...and then?"

"Well, Reg got really scared and told her that he was going to instruct the treasurer to cut the cheque and have the deputy warden sign it.  Judy was furious but told him she wouldn't stop him, although she wouldn't be a party to paying the bill, and that she wasn't finished with her crusade against the Diocese and the injustice that was being done to her parish. She then told me that she would not abide being bullied either by the Diocese or by me."

"'Her parish'...some things never change," he mused. "Well, Robbie will be thrilled to hear from her, I'm sure."

"Sorry, not sorry, Bishop."

They both laughed.

"Well done, Maddie. Well done.  I can't tell you how much easier you have made my week.  As for Judy, well, she'll rant and rave until she finds the next thing to rant and rave about."

"I'd really like to put an end to that cycle," Maddie said, quite seriously.

"If you can do that, Maddie, I'll make you a Canon on the spot!"

Just as then, the door swung open without a knock. It was Judy. She pushed Maddie aside and got right into the Bishop's face.

"Mr. Perkins, I expected more of you. I thought you were in our corner."

"I am Judy, and always have been," the Bishop said calmly, "We are all in the same corner; we're all on the same team."

"Team Jesus," Maddie inserted with a pious smile.

"Hrmph," Judy growled, "These people were counting on you Mr. Perkins...I was counting on you.,"

"Bishop Perkins," Maddie corrected her, with emphasis on 'Bishop."

"It's alright," said the Bishop, "Old habits die hard."

But Maddie was getting angry. She knew Judy was intentionally disrespecting the Bishop.  

"I always knew you had too thin a skin to be a bishop," Judy sneered.

"Oh Judy," he said nonchalantly, "If I had a thicker skin, I couldn't love you the way I do."  

And with that, Judy stormed out.  Maddie was beginning to understand how Bishop Perkins had been able to handle her all these years.  A moment later, Reg Canon, the People's Warden poked his nose sheepishly around the corner.

"Good morning, Bishop," he said tentatively with a nervous quiver in his voice, "Good morning, Miss Maddie."

"Reg!" the Bishop exclaimed and shook his hand warmly, "How good to see you! And thank you for this," he held up the cheque, "You have done a good thing."

"Judy wasn't very happy about it, Bishop...you know how she is..."

"You did the right thing, Reg," then he changed the subject, "How is Marilyn?"

"Oh, she's well, Bishop.  She sends her love - she is with the grandchildren this weekend."

"Ah, wonderful! Give her a big hug for me."

"Yes, thank you Bishop," he nodded deferentially, and with that he was gone.

The Bishop sat down and instructed Maddie to close the door so as to avoid any further interruptions.  He motioned her to take a seat, as well.  They sat quietly for a moment until Maddie broke the silence, "I'm sorry to hear about Mary, Bishop. Everyone here was very fond of her. They loved her."

"So did I, Maddie. Sometimes I still talk to her and ask her what she would have me do.  You know, she still gives me good advice.  Sometimes I even take it."  He smiled and gave a little laugh - a gentle, tender laugh.  "You are doing a fine job here, Maddie.  Don't let Judy get to you.  Thanks to her I was on the verge of more than one nervous breakdown, but every time I stood on the edge of that cliff, Mary pulled me back, grounded me, she saved me.  Every time. She always knew what to do.  But...you, you know what to do all on your own. Well done, indeed."

"Thank you, Bishop."

"I'll let Robbie know about your little white lie and what he has agreed to, and to expect a call from Judy. He'll appreciate how you manoeuvred this. If there's anyone in this diocese that can appreciate a good play, it's Robbie. He'll be impressed.  If Judy hasn't calmed down after talking to him, perhaps we can put her in a ring with Canon Sharpe," the Bishop added, most indiscreetly, "Now that would be a show, eh?"

"We could sell tickets."

"I can think of a lot of people that would pay to see it. Maybe that would be the answer to all the church's financial woes."

They both laughed but their musings about a cage match between Judy Jumblejump and Canon Sharpe were interrupted by a knock on the door. It was the organist who wished to know if the Bishop wanted to sing the Eucharistic prayer.  The Bishop thought he would. There would be no further time to discuss other matters for now it was time to go about the business of doing what priests do on a Sunday morning.